Headaches and hair loss

Today I think I truly realized that our little dude is way different from us. It's not a bad thing, it's just when I got married, I assumed we'd have kids naturally who would then share some of the same qualities as us: charming, hilarious, smart (stroking the ole ego here)...stubborn, fiery, sassy, clumsy...Even if the kid displays the non-desirable qualities, it seems like they might be easier to deal with since they are at least familiar. However, parenting another person's kid who is nothing like either one of us is proving confusing (that's putting it mildly). Obviously I knew little man is not equal parts me and Nate (the curly hair is a dead give away), but watching him play soccer today really reaffirmed it. I am a competitive person, and I think I was pretty high energy as a kid--as was Nate--so watching our little man stand on the soccer field with his hands in his mouth while most of the other kids herded around the soccer ball on the opposite side of the field was a frustrating experience for both of us. I still can't talk, so I could only text things to Nate to say to encourage little guy to participate---but nothing we said worked. He continued to mosey along the field like nobody else was there. I don't know why it frustrated us so much, but by the end of the hour long ordeal--Nate and I were just frazzled. It seems like this is a common feeling for us lately....

We're two months into this parenting gig, and of course, we are doing the best we can for our little man, but I often feel like we come up short. What works one time with him, doesn't work the second time; I'm all out of creative ideas. Pinterest isn't helping either; those tips may work for super moms but apparently I am not a super mom because having little guy hold his tongue for a time after he says bad words just makes him scream louder, or directing him to stomp on the driveway instead of tantruming again just makes him scream louder and makes us seem like the neighborhood crazies. And the book our therapist gave us on the Boys Town model of parenting: CRAP. None of it worked.

We try our hardest to be consistent with our expectations and consequences, but still, it seems like we do little good. I know it will take time for him to adjust to our home--probably way more time than we originally thought. But my head is pounding, and Nate is losing more hair (if that's even possible)...So what's a parent to do when all hope seems gone?

1 comment:

Amy said...

Hang in there guys!!! I don't have any advice (not a super mom either). Know you are continuously in our prayers!