Many of you know how uncertain the Helzer lives are right now. We've had to swallow our pride and live with friends for an undefined length of time as we wait for our house in Ogallala to sell; adoption stuff is up in the air out of our control; we're both stepping into new jobs soon; and one of our vehicles is (we think) on its last leg. We've been overwhelmed. After working on our budget for a few hours this week, we realized that unless we sell our house, we don't have enough money even to rent a cheap place here in Omaha. It was a breaking point for us. I think we both just wanted to get mad and maybe even go to sleep to avoid thinking about it all, but instead we laid on the floor, closed our eyes, held hands, and prayed. We praised God for the blessings He's given us and prayed for peace amidst these crazy times. We prayed for wisdom to make tough decisions, and we prayed that God would use this season to grow us as a couple. I'm not going to lie and say that I've felt instant peace since then because I've still felt a bit lost and hopeless. But one thing God's revealed to me in the last few weeks is that even though things might be unstable in my life, there's one thing that's steady: Him.
Here are a few scriptures I've been considering lately:
Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I gave Egypt as a ransom for your freedom; I gave Ethiopia and Seba in your place. Others were given in exchange for you. I traded their lives for yours because your are precious to me. You are honored, and I love you. --Isaiah 43:1-4
While this scripture is God's message to the people of Israel through the prophet Isaiah, I take great comfort in the truths it carries even today.
Most of Psalm 119 has been an encouragement to me, but it's long. So, I'll only quote a few verses:
My suffering was good for me, for it taught me to pay attention to your decrees. Your instructions are more valuable to me than millions in gold and silver. --Psalm 119:71-72
I am worn out waiting for your rescue, but I have put my hope in your word. My eyes are straining to see your promises come true. When will you comfort me? I am shriveled like a wineskin in the smoke, but I have not forgotten to obey your decrees. --Psalm 119: 81-84
I have suffered much, O Lord; restore my life again as you promised. Lord, accept my offering of praise and teach me your regulations. My life constantly hangs in the balance, but I will not stop obeying your instructions. --Psalm 119: 107-109
The teaching of your word gives light, so even the simple can understand. I pant with expectation, longing for your commands. Come and show me your mercy, as you do for all who love your name. Guide my steps by your word, so I will not be overcome by evil. --Psalm 119: 130-133